Stream of Consciousness

the continuous unedited chronological flow of conscious experience through the mind

With no intended direction, my thoughts today...Beautiful sunny day, thank You, Lord. I'm about sick of this rain and cold. Could we not have an early spring? I'm so ready for green trees and flowers and warm spring breezes and playing with the baby outside and strolling through the Avenue.

Such beautiful music in church today. After we got to church, that is. Poor daughter got stranded with a dead battery at home and we went to help her out and missed Sunday School. Well, I can handle missing S.S. but not worship. And you just have to help your pregnant daughter and her 10 month old baby. And that girl was not happy about missing "Breakfast Sunday"...haha...don't mess with a pregnant woman's breakfast. Anyway, the music was wonderful as we sang "Mighty to Save" and "How Marvelous, How Wonderful" with 90-something choir members and the church looked pretty packed. Then the choir sang "Holy is He" and that was amazing. My minister of music aka my boss was on his game today...I wonder if he's happy with me these days. I keep making mistakes and you know I have that foggy thinking problem that women my age have. Ooops. Who knows, I could be catapulted into a new job at any time...just like last time when my principal didn't like the way I taught my ESOL class even though I was going to class to learn how to teach ESOL and that's how they taught me to teach it and so I decided I needed to find another career because I'd about had it with administration and paperwork and meetings and not getting to spend time teaching when they constantly called me out of my room to translate for the Spanish-speaking parents. Ugh. So here I am, almost 5 years later and I'm happy in my ministry assistant job. For now. But, heck, that's the mentality of my 52-year-old self and could lead to trouble if I don't stop running my mouth.

So here I am, at home, waiting for the Super Bowl to start so I can watch some commercials. I'd like New Orleans to win because I lived in New Orleans for 3 years back in the mid-80s when the Saints' fans wore paper sacks over their heads at the games. Ha! Of course if they don't win, it'll be Bush's fault, right? Alrighty I'm not getting started on the politics stuff. My husband takes care of that end.

Sitting by the fire on a cold, sunny day. Looking forward to the week. Thanks for listening.

Lots of Reasons for Prayer

Just lately in my life I'm feeling the pressure of many changes and some interesting situations. Little granddaughter is growing so fast, walking, so loving and charming. Then there's her mommy who is my much-loved daughter now pregnant again and, though she's feeling well, I still pray for her safety, health and that this littlest one will develop and grow and be born healthy.

My son is praying intently for God's will for his future. I pray for wisdom for him and that he will see clearly and find God's best for him. I feel that there will be some decisions for him to make in the next few months.

I have friends who are in challenging circumstances within their families and are struggling to take things a day at a time and to leave their burdens with the Lord. I'm also stuck in the middle of a sticky situation that is not of my making but is causing some real tension in my life as I try not to get involved but yet try to maintain the peace.

Add all this to some physical stuff I'm experiencing and you get the picture. Hey! My whole body shape is changing with shifting weight! Where my clothes were tight, now they're loose. And vice versa! Haha. AH...it's great being 52.

All this to say that I am following the Bible command to "pray unceasingly". I'm so thankful I have the Lord to listen to me and give me comfort and wisdom.

Thinking of Favorite Things on a Winter Night

Maddie’s smile
Double chocolate doughnuts
A new magazine
Candles
Erin’s brown eyes
Christmas music
Baby Story on TLC
Maple trees in the fall
Brad’s happy face
Choir
My husband’s salt and pepper hair
M&Ms
Popeye’s chicken and biscuits
Stephen’s quirkiness
My Savior’s Presence

Sweet Week!

Nothing out of the ordinary going on these days. Been somewhat busy at work as our choir sang a patriotic musical premiere on Tuesday and now we are getting ready to start our Good Friday/Easter music next week. So I will be busy getting the music ready next week for my boss to present to the choir. Speaking of my "jefe", he was so kind to me last week. I had a very unexpected couple of hours off because of the long days we worked. He insisted and I took him up on it. Encouragement like that makes a person want to work harder and enjoy it!!
Today was spent with daughter and granddaughter. Always so sweet. I love feeling that I can help out especially now that daughter has another baby on the way. I had a blast watching the gbaby walk around like a crazy girl...she looks so little walking around at 10 months. She barely has just learned to crawl and she decided that wasn't enough, I guess. I love the sweet fellowship I have with her mommy and the kisses I get from the baby. Life is just good right now. Thank YOU, Lord.

#52

Birthday Blessings: time with my parents and sister on a day-long outing, lunch out with co-workers and my boss, gift cards to a bookstore and a favorite restaurant, a beautiful pendant watch and dinner out with my sweet husband, the softest new sheets for my bed, an afternoon with my "into-everything" granddaughter, an evening with the family. Good birthday memories. I'm thankful to God for another year with those I love.

A 10 Pound Surprise (36 Years Ago)

This is a nice in-between day to reminisce about my sister and her birth 36 years ago. She turned 36 two days ago and I am about to have my 52nd birthday. We are 16 years apart. The photo above is of us celebrating our birthdays this week with my parents on a very cold day in Birmingham where Tricia lives now with her husband and children. The title of this post is the same title I used for an essay I wrote in 10th grade. I wrote it after Trish was born. She weighed 10 lbs 5 oz. when she was born 10 days late all those years ago.

I remember my mom and dad sitting down with my brother and me one summer day back in 1973. She asked us if we'd like to have a little brother or sister. At the time, I was 15 and my brother was 12. First thing I said was "Are we going to adopt?" At least I remember it that way. The next day I kept looking over at Joe and thinking "did they really say mom's going to have a baby?" It seemed unreal. Back then it was not as common for a woman to have a baby at 36. It happened but not like it does these days.

On January 10, 1974, my mom came into my room in the middle of the night because her water had broken. She was leaving for the hospital and came to say good-bye. My grandmother came to stay with us. I had to get up and go on to my high school and was very distracted all day to say the least. My lit teacher kept asking me to go call family to find out what was going on. She was a comfort to me that day. I arrived home from school to find out my mom and dad had just had a baby girl. That evening we went to visit and I'll never forget the sight of Trish in that incubator. Life went on and I watched my sister as a baby, toddler, child. I got married when she was 5 years old and then moved out of the country some years later. I didn't get to see her do a lot of things as she grew and developed. But I was glad she was home with my folks as I was away and after my brother got married. It just seemed that our home was more settled, stable, and always the same because she was there "keeping my parents young" as people used to say to them!

Now she's 36 with three children of her own. Because of our big difference in age, my parents have grandchildren from ages 25 down to age 3. Pretty cool, I think!

Celebrating Another Life!

Here we go again! We are so happy to announce a second grandchild to be born in September. These babies will be 18 months apart and I hope will be best buddies!
We loved the way our daughter and son-in-law surprised us with the news on New Year's Day. The cute shirt was perfect. Then we had to wait a little bit longer and tell the great-grandparents today. We were determined to do it no matter the icy roads. So we took off around 2:00 today while there was sunshine and some of the ice was melting. We slid around in places but got there safely. Thank You, Lord, for protecting us in our foolishness! haha. We were just ready to TELL! Anyway, the baby is due September 13 which seems like forever but I'm sure it will pass quickly. I pray for safety and good health for Erin and this sweet little new child who is such a blessing from our Lord.

Snow and Ice Day

Last night at around 6 pm, a weather reporter on TV said, "The kids need to go ahead and do their homework. We're not getting much more than this!" At about 8 pm, I stepped outside the door and sleet and snow were coming down hard. This morning we woke up to quite a frozen world. Very beautiful with the sun on the snow and ice.

We have a police scanner we listen to and the police are having a terrible day. People just won't stay home and there are cars in ditches, crashing into each other, and two policemen just had to jump off a high embankment just to keep from being hit by a car sliding toward them.

It's not even 20 degrees and icy, windy, snowy, and beautiful as long as I'm looking at it from my front door as in the picture above. I sure miss seeing my baby granddaughter today though. As soon as we can we're going to meet up and have some fun. More later!

2010

HOPE = Confident Expectation

Getting Ready for 2010

There's something about the imagery of the thriving tree by the stream that I love. I want this in my mind for 2010...something I will strive for in my walk with God whom I love so much. I want Him to be pleased with me, with my faith, with my outward expressions of my faith. I take Him so for granted many days...I want to stop and think daily of all He's done for me. And love Him back by growing like a tree by a river.

Jeremiah 17:7-8 says:

7 "But blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD,
whose confidence is in him.

8 He will be like a tree planted by the water
that sends out its roots by the stream.
It does not fear when heat comes;
its leaves are always green.
It has no worries in a year of drought
and never fails to bear fruit."

Amen to that for 2010.

My Four Christmases

My First Christmas of 2009:
"Only Love" choir presentation...beautiful Christmas trees, lights of all colors, majestic music like "Lo, How a Rose E'er Blooming" with only violin and piano and choir, Irish dancers and choir doing "A Celtic Christmas", huge nativity scene, children's choir singing "Christmastime", singing "The Hallelujah Chorus" at mach 1 speed! This Christmas is my personal one every year...this is the way I get ready for the season...in amazing, worshipful music.

My Second Christmas of 2009:
Family Christmas Party...Presents piled high around a beautiful red and gold tree at my mom's, children, grandchildren, and a great-grandchild making 17 people as we eat, sing carols, open presents, eat dessert, just sit and talk. A wonderful time. We end it with the ladies singing "Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas" in a beautiful arrangement as my sister plays for us. That's tradition! Sometimes we sound great, other times not so great! Ha.

My Third Christmas of 2009:
This takes place on Christmas Eve: We start the evening at our church for the candlelight service. I'm always a little worried since I am responsible for ordering the candles in October and getting them ready for the big night. I hope there's enough...there always is. We have a big crowd, out-of-town family members reunite with old friends, the church is beautiful, there's a children's story, beautiful music, and finally, the candles are lit as we sing all the verses of "Silent Night". This year was especially sweet as I had a little granddaughter to hold. Unfortunately, she was burning with fever with the beginning of a rough Christmas for her with a visit to urgent care on the day after Christmas. Despite that, the evening was lovely, the poinsettias decorating the church were so bright and beautiful.

My Fourth Christmas of 2009:
My home, just the three of us (hubby, son, and me) opening presents, getting a turkey in the oven and loving that smell all morning as it baked, gathering up our gifts for the baby, the daughter and son-in-law, and hauling turkey and all over to their house for a delicious Christmas lunch of turkey, stuffing, sweet potato souffle, and green bean casserole. My daughter gave me a beautiful mother-daughter pendant that I will always treasure. Again the baby was burning with fever, a call was put in to the dr. who recommended an urgent care visit the next day.

Christmas is over...at least the usual celebrating...but I will enjoy these memories all year with my pictures and albums full of the fun times! Through it all, was the knowing that the reason for all of this joy and family time is Jesus. That's all! He is sufficient.

Make a Smilebox scrapbook

Merry Christmas!

Here With Us

Here With Us
Sung by Joy Williams

It's still a mystery to me
That the hands of God could be so small,
How tiny fingers reaching in the night
Were the very hands that measured the sky

Chorus
Hallelujah, hallelujah
Heaven's love reaching down to save the world
Hallelujah, hallelujah
Son of God, Servant King,
You're here with us
You're here with us

Verse 2
It's still a mystery to me,
How His infant eyes have seen the dawn of time
How His ears have heard an angel's symphony,
But still Mary had to rock her Savior to sleep

Chorus
Hallelujah, hallelujah
Heaven's love reaching down to save the world
Hallelujah, hallelujah
Son of God, Servant King
Here with us
You're here with us

Girls' Day Out and Bridal Flashbacks!

Such a fun day today despite the rainy, cold weather. Erin, Maddie,and I met Kelly (Erin's best friend through middle school and high school) at various bridal shops in the area. Kelly was also Erin's maid of honor as you see from the pictures above. This time I was sitting with Kelly's mom, very relaxed, loving watching Kelly try on dress after dress. We visited three bridal shops and I believe Kelly tried on 25 dresses at least. I think the winner is a gorgeous champagne-colored vintage-look dress with beading and lace and lots of glitz. We left home at 9:00 am and returned at 5:30. The baby was an angel and loved hanging out with the girls. She spent many an hour clapping, bouncing, watching everything around her and just, in general, being charming in her pink-striped leggings, pink shirt and RED hair!

Today brought back some wonderful memories of shopping with my own daughter for her wedding dress. It was an exciting time and she looked radiantly beautiful in each dress. It was hard to choose but then the moment came where she knew "this is the dress"! Ah well, maybe I'll get to be in on the dress search for Maddie one day! Balancing on my walker? Who cares! Life is good and I love these blessed and special moments!

Christmas Colors

"Happy, happy Christmas, that can win us back to the delusions of our childhood days, recall to the old man
the pleasures of his youth, and transport the traveler back to his own fireside and quiet home!"
- Charles Dickens

As I'm in the midst of all the Christmas parties, preparations, and special concerts at church, I'm trying to remember some of my childhood Christmases. Maybe having a granddaughter now makes me tend to think back and it really is quite bittersweet when I think of all the time that's passed and how old my parents are, how old I am, and that my own children are in their early to mid-twenties.

One of the first memories I have of Christmas as a child is the beautiful aluminum Christmas tree with the color wheel that was so popular in the early 60s. Wow...that was fascinating to me. I remember just sitting in our living room and watching as the colors passed every few seconds from red to green to blue...was pink in there somewhere also?

Another very distinct memory I have took place on Christmas Eve. All the cousins were outside as we were telling each other good-bye after a special supper and gifts. It was very cold outside and the sky was clear with thousands of stars visible. My uncle pointed out a light that seemed to be flashing and slowly moving across the sky. He urged us to get home and get in bed as Santa was on his way. I remember staring out the car window all the way home hoping we'd make it in time.

I feel very blessed to have had some wonderful childhood Christmases even if I can't remember all of them. My feeling of anticipation and peace at this time of year comes from the traditions and family times of my childhood. Every Christmas Eve one of the cousins recited from memory the story of Jesus' birth in Luke 2. That always happened before we could open our presents. Jesus is the most precious gift of all.

Thanksgiving Minus One Plus Another!

It truly was a good day. I truly do feel thankful. I know I am truly blessed! But I truly missed my boy. Well, he's not really a boy anymore. He's 25 and independent and working a good job and living in his own apartment in Denver, Colorado. This was our first Thanksgiving without him since the Lord blessed us with him back in 1984. He couldn't make it home due to work. But, thankfully, his boss had him over to his house for a family Thanksgiving dinner. I do so appreciate that. I was imagining a frozen dinner sitting in front of the computer or television.

We sure are looking forward to seeing him at Christmas. We're proud of him but I'm just not loving this 2000 miles away thing. Ah well, the Lord knew I would need some distraction this year and gave me the most precious baby granddaughter. I loved watching her sample her first bit of pumpkin pie. Thank you to the best, most loving daughter in the world for sharing her today with me. A truly good day.
(and just 29 days until Christmas)

Thankful to the Lord,

Make a Smilebox slideshow

Jesus Sang!

Matthew 26:30 says "When they had sung a hymn, they went out to the Mount of Olives."
This was right before Jesus was betrayed in the garden. He sang knowing what was ahead of Him.

I have yet to understand fully this love that God has for us. I just give up and admit that I can't comprehend why He did what He did.

In this Thanksgiving week I am so aware of my blessings. I am amazed at my life when I sit and look back on the past 52 years. Why have I had a generally happy life while others have had much heartbreak and difficulties? Well, I'm not naive enough to think those days aren't coming my way. I do realize it and pray that my faith will be strong. I know HE is my best friend and companion.

Music means so much to me and I have been listening to some majestic Christmas arrangements by Michael W. Smith. They make you think of heaven and how "our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all" (2 Cor. 4:17). Jesus knew what was ahead of Him as He sang that hymn. He knew the agony coming and the glory after that. It's said that traditionally the hymns sung at the Passover were Psalms 115-118. I love Psalm 115:

1 Not to us, O LORD, not to us
but to your name be the glory,
because of your love and faithfulness.

2 Why do the nations say,
"Where is their God?"

3 Our God is in heaven;
he does whatever pleases him.

4 But their idols are silver and gold,
made by the hands of men.

5 They have mouths, but cannot speak,
eyes, but they cannot see;

6 they have ears, but cannot hear,
noses, but they cannot smell;

7 they have hands, but cannot feel,
feet, but they cannot walk;
nor can they utter a sound with their throats.

8 Those who make them will be like them,
and so will all who trust in them.

9 O house of Israel, trust in the LORD—
he is their help and shield.

10 O house of Aaron, trust in the LORD—
he is their help and shield.

11 You who fear him, trust in the LORD—
he is their help and shield.

12 The LORD remembers us and will bless us:
He will bless the house of Israel,
he will bless the house of Aaron,

13 he will bless those who fear the LORD—
small and great alike.

14 May the LORD make you increase,
both you and your children.

15 May you be blessed by the LORD,
the Maker of heaven and earth.

16 The highest heavens belong to the LORD,
but the earth he has given to man.

17 It is not the dead who praise the LORD,
those who go down to silence;

18 it is we who extol the LORD,
both now and forevermore.
Praise the LORD.


HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

Life as a Music Ministry Assistant

Just for the heck of it I’ll describe my life as a music ministry assistant. I am very blessed to have my particular job. Probably many people might wonder how in the world the position of music minister’s assistant could be a full-time job. It’s a job that involves a minister of music, 127 active choir members, a middle school choir, a senior adult choir, a minister of instrumental music and orchestra, a media director, many co-workers, a church membership that has definite opinions on the music they like/dislike, technology, paperwork, library, printing/advertising, tidying up, cataloging, decorating, undecorating, ordering food for choir gatherings.

I reserve facilities,enjoy planning short trips, taking money for various projects, fitting choir members’ outfits, ordering those outfits, ordering music, publishing newsletters, proof orders of service, answer phones, and emails. I make sure we have 2200 candles for the Christmas Eve candlelight service counted and ready to give out, am responsible for scheduling Senior Adult choir outings at nursing homes, setting up rooms for choirs, do computer work to put lyrics on screens in the Worship Center for the congregation and for the singers, soloists, and narrators for every Sunday service and special events, schedule soloists and ensembles a month ahead, and keep track of all the choir members’ birthdays.

You add the proofing of texts and programs, the interruptions, the keeping track of the boss’ schedule, the sick folks who need hospital visits, who need TLC for their various troubles, family crises, the personality differences of all those I work with, the expectations, the assumptions and demands and you have quite the workload.

I enjoy the seasonal schedule immensely. We are always preparing ahead. We begin work on Christmas in the month of August, Easter in the month of January, Patriotic starts in April. I can tell you the date of every Sunday in the year in a matter of seconds. As we say in the Music Office, it is always Wednesday or Sunday…it certainly seems that way. It’s a varied job, never a dull moment, has hilarious mornings, testy afternoons, involves me with both wonderful and challenging people and most importantly, is something I do “as unto the Lord”. That keeps it all in perspective. I’m very thankful for my job. You know you've got a great job when you don't dread Sunday nights!! Monday's ahead and I am happy to see it come.

Christmas Ornament

This is the ornament I bought today for my Christmas tree. I anticipate Christmas this year because of Madison. This little ornament is a symbol to me that in 2009 I received one of my most treasured blessings ever.

I Heard the Bells...

A little early I know but this is one of my favorite Christmas songs. Our choir is doing the "Casting Crowns" version this year and it just fit with my devotional time this morning as I studied His word and one of Beth Moore's books.
The words to the song are:

I heard the bells on Christmas day
Their old familiar carols play
And mild and sweet their songs repeat
Of peace on earth good will to men

And the bells are ringing
Like a choir they're singing
In my heart I hear them
Peace on earth, good will to men

And in despair I bowed my head
There is no peace on earth I said
For hate is strong and mocks the song
Of peace on earth, good will to men

But the bells are ringing
Like a choir singing
Does anybody hear them?
Peace on earth, good will to men

Then rang the bells more loud and deep
God is not dead, nor doth He sleep
The wrong shall fail, the right prevail
With peace on earth, good will to men

Then ringing singing on its way
The world revolved from night to day
A voice, a chime, a chant sublime
Of peace on earth, good will to men

And the bells they're ringing
Like a choir they're singing
And with our hearts we'll hear them
Peace on earth, good will to men

I especially love the verse "God is not dead, not doth He sleep". Such a comforting and victorious thought! We are, according to Moore's study, living in the end times. She states six signs including "1)Christians will long for Christ's return before the world ever sees it. 2)Many will come claiming to be Christ. 3)The world will display dramatic increases in depravity. 4)The latter days will show a notable increase in violence and cataclysmic events. 5)The worldwide witness of the gospel of Jesus Christ will increase. 6)The activity of the Holy Spirit will increase."

Number 5 is very meaningful to me. I was privileged to serve as a missionary with the International Mission Board from 1986-1995 in Guatemala. We saw the Bible translated into a language that had never had the written WORD before. (Wycliffe translaters did this). My husband went out to groups of people who had never heard of the United States much less Jesus. Right now I see that even though our country is seemingly godless with the administration in charge and there is much violence and depravity, God is still blessing America. Simply because we are sending thousands of missionaries to places that have never heard. Jesus will not come back until "The gospel of the kingdom will be preached in the whole world as a testimony to all nations, and then the end will come" Matthew 24:14.

God is not dead, nor doth He sleep. The wrong shall fail, the right prevail with that FINAL peace of a new heaven and a new earth and satan defeated.

Favorites!

Just thinking of the fact that we'll be celebrating Thanksgiving in a few weeks. To me, thankful=favorites. My favorite people, blessings, things, places!

1. JESUS, of course. My constant Companion, Savior, Shepherd, Friend.
2. GOD, my Father, my Source. He holds all in His hands.
3. THE HOLY SPIRIT. Discipline, love, guidance, JOY!
4. FAMILY. Loving, patient husband. Beautiful daughter. Excellent son-in-law. Cutest baby granddaughter in the world. Adventurous son. Healthy, happy parents. Brother & sister & their spouses & my nieces/nephews...FUN!
5. FRIENDS. Erin, Cheryl. Church folk.
6. AUTUMN. Red, yellow, orange, green, crisp, fragrance, anticipation. Bluest sky.
7. CHOCOLATE. No need to explain.
8. MUSIC. Choirs, violins, Christmas, Peace on Earth. Hallelujah Chorus!
9. BOOKS. The smell, the feel, the losing myself in the story for hours at a time.
10. HEAVEN. My home. Someday.

MEOW!

Spooks
- by Sandra Liatsos

There's a goblin at my window,
A monster by my door.
The pumpkin at my table
Keeps on smiling more and more.
There's a ghost who haunts my bedroom,
A witch whose face is green.
They used to be my family,
Till they dressed for Halloween.
(OR a Leopard Kitty all dressed up for her
First Halloween!!)

Denver Update

For those of you who have been so good to say you'd pray for Stephen, here is the latest. After arriving in Denver, he was initiated quickly into the climate! Lots of snow that first week there. He spent the week scouting out the restaurants, stores, etc., and then that first Sunday went up to Lafayette, Colorado and attended a thriving contemporary church. After the service, he and his friends went out into the Rockies and hiked about 7 miles and as Stephen put it "def saw some bear claw prints". Whoa. The next week he landed a job, after calling 27 plumbers in the area. He works now full-time as a plumber-apprentice. After 60 days they will raise his pay and provide benefits. We pray all will work out in that area. He is training and experiencing some interesting sights and work situations!

This past weekend he visited another church and will probably be looking around for a while until he finds what he wants. The area had warm weather again this past weekend but today he woke up to more snow. Stephen has always loved hot weather and desert areas so he's got some acclimating to do.

Thank you for all your prayers. We are proud of the boy and hope he will thrive and grow in his new home.